Deja Vu

Marc & I are okay, but lately, I feel like I'm going through things with Mike again. So I'll just say it, Marc relapsed. I never expected I go through this again but with someone else or even with Marc. Marc always seemed stronger than Mike &...

Just A(nother) Vent

I am so frustrated with my ex-husband. I really don't know why he wanted our children to live with him. But we agreed the children would live wherever they wanted. My oldest wanted to go with him, my youngest wanted to stay with me.   After just...

I Lost My Job

When I started college I had a couple jobs, but since I got pregnant in my freshmen year I wound up giving up work & college to be a stay at home mom. 🤰   After 17 years I decided to go back to work. My kids were 16 & 11 (12 now) so it...

I'm Getting My Baby Back

My mom & I made a decision that I'm going to get Tiffany back. I know she wants to stay at her father's until the end of the school year, but it's just not a good environment for her. When I agreed to let her live with her father I never thought...

My Poor Tiff

The past two days have been uneventful. Tiffany is coming down tonight so I'll get to spend some time with her since she's not coming this weekend. Her father hasn't even taken the time yet to tell me he wants to keep her on my weekend. At least when...

Spring is Here

Coping with Mike's death has it's harder days, this weekend being two of them. The weather has been absolutely gorgeous and I'm trying to enjoy it with Marc and Kendra but all I keep thinking is, "Look at this beautiful day Mike and you're missing...

Happy Valentine's Day

I don't nomally celebrate Valentine's Day, even with my 2 previous husbands I didn't, but I just love Marc so much I had to get him a li'l something. I bought him a card a month ago that says exactly how I felt at the time, maybe not so much now. 😄 Oh...

Christina Milian

Sweet girl... as far as I know. Obviously I do not know her personally, but her public persona is very sweet. Two years ago she was kicked off Dancing With the Stars when she was the first dancer of the season to score a 10. Everyone was in shock...

Natalie Nunn

My first post gets to be about a Natalie Nunn. If you're anything like me you're asking yourself, who?! I don't know really. I've never heard of her until today. Apparently she's a reality television star. Odd, is she? Because I'm a reality television...

I'll Drink to That... Random Title

I feel like this is going to be a stressful weekend. I have a lot going on tomorrow, but also my family and I are going out to dinner to celebrate my birthday so I'm excited about that. The day will be long, but the evening will be nice. I'll have to...

A Month Gone By

I started this journal when I was separated from my first husband and had just married my second. I thought I needed a change and a new journal so I left my old one behind. I can't even remember my username for it or even if that site exists anymore....

Good Weekend

Last night was amazing and today even better. Things with Marc and I just keep getting better & better. Last night we took the kids to the monster truck show, they had a good time and it was nice to get out of the house for a change....

Getting Back to Normal

I feel like things are getting better. I wanna say they are going back to normal, but normal for me is when I think about Mike almost 24/7. It's weird. As soon as the detective said those two words that will forever haunt me, "Mike's dead." my brain...

It's Him

I saw Michael's body today. I know my previous post was about him getting cremated, but apparently I was lied to. He hasn't been cremated just yet. His mother went and seen him yesterday and stopped by today. I had a nice visit with his mother and his...

He's Gone 😭

It's been 6 days since Mike died. It's still kind of shocking to me. His cousins have reached out to me, his mother, his sister. He was cremated 2 or 3 days ago.   Day 1 I spent just sitting in shock, repeating the detectives words over &...

Take It Back

"Mike's dead." 😲 Those words will forever haunt me. Friday night, around 10:30 a detective knocked on my door asking me if I was married to Mike. I let him in and when I asked him what was going on, his response was, "Mike's dead." I was more shocked...

👋🏽 Goodbye Christmas

A month of build up and in a day it's all over. 😕 My Christmas wasn't anything like I expected it to be. I was a bit excited that I'd be spending my first Christmas with Marc.🎄 But it didn't go as I expected. Christmas morning we got up and watch the...

Clueless This Year

Christmas shopping isn't going too well. I barely got the kids anything, or Marc for that matter. I'm getting MJ the day after Christmas and I haven't gotten him anything either. 😔   I'm actually thinking about getting Marc a boat 🛥 and if I am...

Reflections

Today is one of those days I'm sitting here in peace. I'm taking this time to reflect because things are going to get really busy for me tomorrow. While Kendra is at church & Marc's at work I sit here in silence. It's a rare moment for me. It...

A Real One

I'm super excited. 💃 I start work on Monday at one of the campgrounds about 15 minutes from my house. My dream is to own a campground 🏕 and I know I'll never be able to afford such a thing so this is the closet I'll get.   I guess you could say...

Parade Day!

These past two days have been pretty relaxing. I'm trying to spend as much as my free time doing nothing before I start this new job. 😆 Today is the Halloween Parade. 🎃 Kendra is in it so I'm excited to see that. This is her second time in the...

Happy Weekend

I'm super excited. We're going camping this week, leaving in a few hours. 😆 We haven't gone camping since July and will only be the third time this year, second with my camper. Tonight will be so busy. We have to check in, set up, pick Kendra up at...

Google Plus Entries

After a bit of thinking I've decided to delete my Google+ account. In doing so I'd like to keep my posts so I'm just going to copy & paste them here. This may be a longer entry than I thought.   11/26/15     I posted the following: "I have...

Goodbye Florida

I just got home from my vacation to Florida. I loved almost every minute of it. Marc & I did have our first problem of our relationship, but we got over it quickly and without raised voices. I feel like it's made us stronger.   Any way, our...